HobokenFoodCritic

Here are a couple of interesting facts I learned about Oktoberfest, from the label on a bottle of Sam Adams Oktoberfest, one of my all-time favorite beers:

1. In Germany, Oktoberfest is actually in September.
2. The best selling Oktoberfest beer in the world is Sam Adams Oktoberfest (what a surprise they would write this on their own label).

Unfortunately, I missed the Helmers’ Oktoberfest Party on Thursday, October 18 because I was home studying for the GMAT. But after finally completing the grueling exam this past Saturday, Ashley and I wanted to go out for a celebratory dinner–not only for the fact that I scored fairly well, but also because I wouldn’t be bogged down by studying anymore (which, coincidentally, is why I hadn’t written anything for over a week). We chose Helmers’ because we thought its festiveness this time of year would be fitting for our occasion, and we wanted to make up for the night we missed there.

When we arrived, we grabbed drinks at the bar while waiting for a table. Helmers’ has an extensive beer menu, which is one of the main reasons why it is one of my favorite hangouts. I ordered a Paulaner, and Ashley ordered a of Framboise Lambic–a sweet, raspberry beer (although it doesn’t taste like beer) that Helmers’ has on tap. As we sipped our drinks, we surveyed the scene, watching the plates of food being served to the tables and trying to decide what we were in the mood for.

By the time we had nearly finished our drinks, we were called to be seated. As always, our waiter was pleasant and friendly, as were the bartenders who had served us.

Now, if you love to gorge yourself with fried onion rings, then you need to try Helmers’ Bavarian Onion Rings. This appetizer is nothing more than a huge mound of razor-thin slivers of fried onions. It looks almost like a funnel cake, and definitely has a “wow” effect when it arrives to the table. It is probably too much for just 2 people, but we finished it anyway. It would have been nice if they gave us something to dip them in, though we ate them so fast we didn’t notice at the time. When we finished, we noticed how soaked in grease the napkin was beneath the onion rings. Wow.

Ordering the main course was easy for Ashley, but difficult for me. It was easy for her because she knew she wanted the Bauernwurst and Bacon Salad after she saw someone else eating it the last time we were there. It was difficult for me because I am by no means an expert on German food, so deciphering the menu was a bit difficult. I didn’t think the menu was descriptive enough for someone who doesn’t know the difference between wurst and schnitzel, however our waiter was extremely accomodating and helped me decide on the Wurst Platter, so I could sample a few different things.

Ashely’s salad was hearty helping of mixed greens and vegetables topped with chunks of bauernwurst–which looks and tastes almost like keilbasa–each wrapped with a thin slice of smoked bacon. Although a salad, it was a full meal (though lighter than most other selections on the menu). Ashley said she would definitely order it again sometime soon.

My meal was a platter of 3 assorted wursts (which are German-style sausages): bratwurst, knackwurst, and weisswurst. I didn’t know which one was which, so I identified them as the white one, the grey one, and the pink one. The sauerkraut on the side was smooth and almost velvety–it was by far the best sauerkraut I’ve ever had. In the middle of the platter was a plop of mashed potatoes smothered in gravy–also excellent. We were also given three different kinds of mustard for dipping–one that was sweet and mild, one that was sweet and a little spicy, and one that was “hot” (though it really wasn’t that bad). All three were pretty good and it was fun to dip the different kinds of wurst in all the different mustards. In case you didn’t know, guys love condiments.

My second beer was a Weihenstephan, which is another great beer that I drink all the time (they also have it on tap at Maxwell’s). Although I have been drinking it for years, I only learned how to pronounce its name properly that night, from out waiter.

As for the different kinds of wurst, their flavors varied. The pink one, which I later found out was the knackwurst, tasted almost like a hot dog–it was good, but nothing I hadn’t tasted before. The white one (weisswurst) was a bit bland, but it dressed up nicely with some mustard, gravy, and onions. The grey one, which was the bratwurst, was my favorite–it was delicious, and I would probably order a meal that features bratwurst specifically next time I eat there.

As usual, our experience at Helmers’ was both fun and educational. I guess you could say that Helmers’ takes traditional German food and “jazzes it up” a bit–somehow, the restaurant has managed to put together a perfect mix of tradition and modernness.

It was a big, heavy meal, so afterward we had to go home to digest for a little while. Then, we walked down to 3 Forty Grill to have a few martinis. 3 Forty Grill is one of my favorite restaurants in Hoboken, and sometimes we also go there to drink martinis in their lounge area, when we are in the mood for that sort of thing. The atmosphere is dark and trendy, with the standard electronic lounge music setting the mood in the background. While we were there, I noticed that people who work at lounges always seem so serious–they don’t smile much. It was a sharp contrast from the atmosphere at Helmers’, where the lighting is bright and all the employees have smiles on their faces. Wouldn’t you expect the German restaurant to be the serious one?

Rain was pouring down, we didn’t have much in the fridge, and we weren’t in the mood to order in, so we went to Ted & Jo’s (on the corner of 11th and Park), since it is a short walk away and reasonably priced. We have been to Ted & Jo’s many times, and the food and service are both spotty. We had one experience where we were seated and then just forgotten about until we got up and asked someone for service after about 15 minutes. Another time our waitress kept forgetting about us. Other times our orders have been messed up. I will say, however, that when the owner is present, he stays on top of things to ensure the service is good.

Experiences with their food have not been much more consistent. Any dish involving grilled chicken, such as the Barbecue Chicken Salad or “The Clinton” chicken sandwich, almost always comes out with the chicken overcooked. When we tried the Fish and Chips, the fish was over-fried and dark brown. Most of the time, we order from the specials menu, because the specials tend to be pretty decent.

This time the service was good from the beginning–we were seated promptly and we ordered drinks right away. I had a Blue Moon, and Ashley had a glass of Ruffino Chianti. The night was off to a good start.

As we overlooked the menus, I was reminded that I’m not crazy about the menu at Ted & Jo’s. The menu seems rather limited, and there never seems to be anything on it that excites me, especially after being disappointed more often than not.

Ashley ordered the chicken pot pie, because she wanted to compare it to the one at Maxwell’s, which is right up the street. She had a chicken pot pie at Maxwell’s a few weeks ago, and although she enjoyed it, she said there was room for improvement.

When the meal arrived, it was not a chicken pot pie at all, but rather just a bowl filled with all the stuff that would be inside a pot pie. It was topped with a small puff pastry. Although the dish was not quite what she expected, Ashley gave it a chance, thinking that sometimes “different is good”. But not this time–it tasted disappointingly bland. I tried a few bites and agreed. Even after loading it up with salt and pepper, it still had very little flavor.

I ordered a burger, cooked medium-well (which is how I like my burgers), with provolone and mushrooms. Since I had eaten fries for lunch that day, I asked if I could substitute my fries with a small side salad, which was no problem. The meat was cooked perfectly, and although the bun it was served on didn’t have much flavor, I have to say it was a pretty good burger overall.

Our waitress, who was very nice, kept coming back at regular intervals. When I finished my Blue Moon, I ordered another. But that was the last we heard from our waitress until we were done with our meals, about 15 minutes later, when she finally brought me my second beer.

I guess we couldn’t complain too much, since the bill was only $38.

Ted & Jo’s is the kind of place that I wish I liked, but I just can’t because of the experiences we’ve had. It’s a small local Irish bar & grill that looks very appealing from the outside, and has a nice, clean, relaxed atmosphere inside. There is also outdoor seating. In fact, I think the visual appeal is what keeps us coming back–we keep giving it another chance after enough time passes that any negative experiences don’t seem so bad anymore. I feel like the place has so much potential, but continues to fall short.

As we walked home, we talked about our experience. Ashley remarked, “Well, another mediocre meal at Ted & Jo’s. Who makes a chicken pot pie like that?”

A trip to the uptown Bagel Smashery has always been, in my view, more about the fun atmosphere and the unique concept than about the quality or value.

For those of you who don’t know what it is, the act of “bagel smashing” is simply toasting the bagel with a sandwich press, which results in a flattened creation that might resemble a panini. If you are not in the mood for a “smashed” bagel, you can order your bagel “sober”, which, by contrast, means not toasted at all.

The uptown Smashery is the second of two locations. The original shop is located downtown, on First Sreet. Several years ago, a young couple bought the rights to use the Bagel Smashery concept for their small uptown sub shop called Josh & Ive’s, which became more widely known as the “uptown Bagel Smashery”.

The tiny shop on Willow Ave (between 9th and 10th) grew to be a popular breakfast and lunch shop, where hung-over customers would sometimes overflow out the door on Saturday and Sunday mornings. They offered (and still offer) a wider variety on the menu than the downtown location, expanding beyond bagels to include subs, wraps, and breakfast burritos.

The food, particularly the breakfast food, was never that great. Actually, it was far from great. The bagels tasted more like bread than bagels. The breakfast burritos were wrapped in a rubbery tortilla, and filled with eggs that always had a grayish tint. And it was all expensive.

Yet, as you approached the uptown Bagel Smashery, you would always hear their speakers blaring music such as Guns ‘N’ Roses, Jimi Hendrix, or Jack Johnson out through the screen door. In front of the shop, you were commonly greeted by a chalkboard that had some kind of hip or humorous quotation written on it.

Inside, though cramped (and often crowded), you were always met with a lively, vibrant atmosphere. Small photos were scattered all over the colorful walls. And the owners, Josh and Ive, were always upbeat and pleasant, and their attitudes added to the experience.

Bringing new people to the uptown Bagel Smashery was always fun–if Josh found out that it was someone’s first time there, he would ring a bell and and announce the presence of a “first-timer”, and all the employees would cheer.

I remember one time I went there on a Saturday afternoon around 3pm, and Josh was sitting there with his Apple laptop, designing new menus for the business.

“Check this out,” he said, “What do you think?”

I gave a nod of approval.

He went on to tell me the whole concept he was trying to convey with the menu, and as I was trying to decide which sandwich I wanted, he explained the techniques he used to make a few of the sandwiches.

Although the chicken cordon bleu sandwich I eventually decided upon that day was nothing more than mediocre, there is something to be said about the fact that Josh and Ive put their whole hearts into the shop which bore their names. It was that passion that kept their customers coming back.

And so Ashley and I were sad to see a “for sale” sign on the establishment over a year ago. (more…)

I thought it might be a good idea to post my 5 favorite hangouts. Now, understand, I am not saying that these are the best places in Hoboken, but rather they are the places you would most likely find me when I’m not home. I’m not really into many of the trendy, contemporary quasi-lounges that keep cropping up around town. Instead, I usually tend to gravitate toward establishments that have a bit more of a relaxed atmosphere where you can let your guard down a bit, pound a few good beers, or get a solid, inexpensive meal.

Most of my favorite hangouts are in uptown Hoboken, mainly because of their proximity to where I live, but also because I can only take so much of the just-out-of-college craziness that goes on downtown. That is not to say there aren’t outstanding bars and restaruants downtown–there is definitely a ton of variety down there no matter what type of experience you are in the mood for, and there are plenty of places that I visit frequently. However, not as frequently as the establishments I would call my “favorites”.

So, without further ado, in no particular order, here are my 5 favorite hangouts in Hoboken, with some notes on each:

Maxwell’s ~ Corner of Washington and 11th ~ I’ve eaten here more than any other restaurant in Hoboken, mainly because of the variety of good food, friendly service, generous portions, reasonable prices, and really cool atmosphere. It’s Hoboken’s version of South Street Philly or New York’s CBGB’s, but Maxwell’s is more than just a punkish bar/restaurant–there is also a small (but legendary) concert area in a separate room off to the side that hosts local and emerging artists, and sometimes some bigger acts. Strangely, non-punks like myself need not feel out of place. I’ve only seen one concert there, but this place is a favorite of mine because you can always get a good, inexpensive meal–whether you are in the mood for beer-battered shrimp, a huge chicken sandwich, meatloaf, a huge burrito, a ‘health salad’, or ‘Hoboken’s best quesadillas’. They call it all “comfort food”, and let me tell you, it is comforting.

Helmers’ Cafe ~ Corner of Washington and 11th (opposite Maxwell’s) ~ One of best beer menus in Hoboken, Helmers’ came roaring back to life when it reopened in August 2007 after a fire left it vacant for over a year. This place always seems to be busy, and it’s no surprise–the combination of authentic German food, premium Imported beers, and a classy yet relaxed atmosphere makes this one of the more unique hangouts in town. Expect to pay a little extra on average for their beers, but I’m sure the predominantly 30-something crowd can handle it. I usually just go down the menu and try anything I’ve never had before. Ashley loves Helmers’ because it is the only bar we’ve ever been to where she can get Framboise Lambic (raspberry beer) on tap.

McMahon’s Brownstone Ale House ~ Willow Ave between 10th and 11th ~ My local hole-in-the-wall Irish pub. Some of the friendliest bartenders I’ve come across in Hoboken. It’s the only bar on my favorites list that has a pool table, and sometimes on a slow weeknight, the bartender will challenge you to a game. And by the way, pool is free on Tuesdays. On the weekends, McMahon’s is more lively, and often overtaken by birthday parties or large groups of pub crawlers. Awesome digital jukebox. The owner, Francis (”Fran”), is a super nice guy with an Irish accent who takes pride in his bar and his clientèle. The small, old-school TV’s could use some updating, but they have never taken away from my having a great time at this place.

Liberty Bar ~ 14th Street between Washington and Hudson ~ My favorite place to watch sports, Liberty Bar has about 20 crystal-clear flat screens plus a huge projection screen on the back wall. It’s almost like walking into the TV section of BestBuy. They also have some of the best burgers, sandwiches, fries, appetizers, and salads in town. Very reasonably priced. Try the bleu cheese burger or one of the several filet mignon sandwiches they offer. Beer selection is decent (they have Blue Moon and Sam Adams’ Seasonals), service is friendly. Daily drink and/or food specials. Rumor has it that Artie Lange hangs out there once in a while.

Farside ~ Washington Street between 5th and 6th ~ Casual, good beer menu, good music, good service. Black motif with red light bulbs (gotta love it), and there are about 10 flat screens showing whatever sporting events are on at the time. Darts. Limited outside seating, but if it’s not crowded you can sometimes snag the coveted wicker couch. This place is usually packed on Sundays. Decent bar food….I have not yet tried their fabled ‘Fat Bastard’ burger, which is smothered in a mound of bacon. I’ll post an update when that day comes, if my arteries don’t clog before I get home. Farside is a great place to hang out when you just want to go somewhere and chill, particularly during the week, and it is also a great place to hit for a few drinks to get warmed up for a big weekend night out.